Failure leads to success

My daughter who had just started grade 7 at a large high school of 1300 students wanted to audition for the student talent show. She had been taking singing lessons for a few weeks and even though she had made some progress singing in tune she still was no nightingale... She wanted to sing a Celine Dion sappy love song for the show (not exactly what would appeal to most 13 to 18 year olds). We applauded her determination but cautioned her that she would need to practice hard to succeed in this kind of competition. One night, a month later, she announced that the auditions were the following day and that she would try out. My husband and I looked at each other with surprise and apprehension. We had not heard her practice the song or even play it on her CD player to learn the melody. She wasn't ready for the audition. She might be ridiculed and be heart broken. Wanting to shield her from disappointment, I told her that I didn't think she was ready yet. I made a mistake. She was angry with us and felt betrayed. She stormed out of the room crying. To her credit, she went ahead and auditioned anyways. She didn't make it. It did not seem to be such a big deal to her. She was happy she had auditioned. She is going to try out again next year.

Sometimes we shy away from stepping over the boundary of our comfort zone for fear of failing even though our heart tells us it needs to move in that direction to be fulfilled. The thing is, failure paves the way for success.

If we are willing, we can learn from failures. Failures are windows into ourselves. They allow us to take a long hard look at what we are lacking in order to succeed. Failures help us become pro-active. We reflect on the lessons learned and address potential obstacles ahead of time so that we can overcome them on our next attempt.

Failures also shine a light on our strengths and qualities. In order to persevere with our dream we need to reacquaint ourselves with the reason why we tried and failed in the first place. We tap into our will: the passion that fueled our desire to succeed. Failures teach us determination, resolve and optimism.

Margaret Wheatley is a hero of mine. I once heard her say that the word courage comes from the french word "coeur" (heart). To have courage means that you follow your heart. The heart gives you the strength to overcome the fear. There is no courage if there is no fear. You feel the fear (the fear of failure or the fear or ridicule, etc.) and you do it anyway.

What is it that your heart wants that your are not pursuing for fear of failure?

Take a look at this video clip about men and women who lived disappointments in their early years but persisted and went on to become leaders in their fields.

Failure Video

Some notable quotes on failure:

"The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure."
-Sven Goran Eriksson

"Failure is only the opportunity to begin again, only this time more wisely."
-Henry Ford

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
-Thomas Alva Edison

"Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm."
-Sir Winston Churchill